The Life and Times of Iceduck

Suggestions for E-reader Upgrades

2009-10-21T00:59:00.002+01:00

I'm not that interested in e-readers, but that's because I feel books have many advantages. Still, I'm optimistic, and I'm sure the technology can be advanced enough that it is indistinguishable from the magic of books. Here are my top ten suggestions:

1 - If a fly lands on the device, and you crush it, the device should transfer the colour and permanently to your current page.

2 - Virtual bookmarks! Official Harry Potter ones, bits of ribbon, important cheques, Pokémon trading cards and the option to dog-ear pages.

3 - There should be a soft, wobbly version of the device. Charts for both devices should be listed separately in shops.

4 - If Torchwood books are released, I expect the reader to emulate the satisfying cracking sound that occurs circa page 80.

5 - It should technically be possible to turn two pages at once. Although this will never happen, one will always feel the need to check.

6 - Each book should have a specific smell encoded. This smell should gradually change from "new book smell" to "old book smell".

7 - There should be a way to lend a friend a single book, instead of your entire collection. I have never needed to do the latter.

8 - For pirate books, the reader should automatically delete the cover.

9 - For well-read books, the reader should allow it to "fall" open on popular passages. (Your Father's Passing; Not My Daughter You Bitch).

10 - Replicate real books' magical ability to burn their contents onto your memory, so you remember the part of a page each word appears on.

Winning at Coin Flipping

2009-09-16T20:39:00.000+01:00

This is an explanation of Penney's Game, as seen on Derren Brown's show, How to Win the Lottery. The case shown in the programme had a quirk that meant the explanation wasn't clear, so here is the way it works.

Two opponents are going to flip a coin. They will each choose a sequence of three (say, tails-heads-tails and heads-heads-heads), and whenever one of the two sequences comes up, that participant wins the round, and the game begins again.

The question here is whether there is a way for the participant who chooses second to improve her chance of winning.

Firstly, it's important to realise that all eight possible combinations are equally likely to come up by turn 3:

HHH
HHT
HTH
HTT
THH
THT
TTH
TTT

They each have a probability of 1-in-8 of coming up. This means that the two participants will have an equal chance of winning at this point, but it's far more likely (3-in-4) that neither will win.

But! The important thing here is if either participant wins, the round ends. Otherwise, it continues. Let's assume the first participant chose tails-heads-tails (THT). This leaves seven possibilities:

1 - HHH
2 - HHT
3 - HTH
4 - HTT
5 - THH
6 - TTH
7 - TTT

In the next round, the last two digits will become the FIRST two digits. Cases 4 and 7 will give identical results - it's irrelevant that they had different results on the first throw, because only the last three throws matter.

This means that the participant who chose THT has a chance of winning in cases 3 and 6 - as long as the next coin shows tails. This is the sneaky bit. If the second participant had chosen HTH or TTH (i.e. the combinations in 3 and 6), the odds of the first particpant winning on the next turn would be halved.

So, which to choose? Assuming no-one won in turn three, TTH has a chance of coming up in turn four in cases 4 and 7. HTH, on the other hand, can only come up in case 2. This is because the first participant chose the second combination ending in -HT.

The trick to remember is to flip the MIDDLE value of the first participant's combination, use that as the first value, and use the participant's first two values as your last two. So HTT gives HHT, HHH gives THH, etc.

Let's look at this in detail. Participant One chooses THT. We flip the middle value (H) for our first value (T) and use the first two values (TH) as our last two, giving us TTH. As discussed, the first turn will be a 1-in-8 chance for both, and in six cases, the game will continue:

HHH - 1/8
HHT - 1/8
HTH - 1/8
HTT - 1/8
THH - 1/8
TTT - 1/8

On the next throw, values beginning with HH and TT are at an advantage, because there are two values apiece ending with those two in turn three. We get this:

HHH - 2/12
HHT - 2/12
HTH - 1/12
HTT - 1/12
THH - 1/12
THT - 1/12
TTH - 2/12
TTT - 2/12

So participant one's chances have decreased from 1/8 to 1/12, while participant two's have improved from 1/8 to 1/6. But the trick works again! Because there are six cases in which the game continues:

HHH - 1/6
HHT - 1/6
HTH - 1/12
HTT - 1/12
THH - 1/12
TTT - 1/6

Again, you can see that values ending in -HH and -TT are at an advantage (with a 1/6 and 1/12 combination each - these will come up 1-in-4 times), and -TH at a disadvantage (with only a single 1/12 combination allowing this).

Feel free to draw out the probability tables yourself. In turn 5, paritipant two has a 1-in-6 chance of winning, while participant three a 1-in-18 chance. In turn 6, participant two will have a 1-in-14 chance, while participant one now has a 5-in-28 chance. In short, by the time participant one's combination comes up, it's likely that participant two's combination will have come up already.

The specific case in Derren Brown's show was an interesting one. Remember when I mentioned there were two combinations that would help a participant get the correct combination on the following turn? There are two combinations that cancel out THEMSELVES - shooting yourself in the foot, since the second participant will do the same thing. This means that after the first three turns, it will be impossible for these suicidal combinations to come up before the opponent's.

These combinations are heads-heads-heads and tails-tails tails. Here it is in action.

The first participant chooses HHH, and the opponent therefore chooses THH. As ever, by turn three, they each have a 1-in-8 chance of winning. But!:

*HHH*
HHT
HTH
HTT
*THH*
THT
TTH
TTT

If you look at the remaining six cases - the combinations which will cause the game to continue - NONE of them end in -HH. That is, it will be impossible for opponent one to win in turn 4, while opponent two still has the normal 1-in-6 chance of winning on the next turn. This will continue to be the case until opponent two has won.

This skews the numbers entirely. Opponent two now has a 7-in-8 chance of winning before a single coin has been thrown. This makes it far easier to spot than in any other case, and makes the trick seem far less impressive when presented by Mssr Brown.

PS: Interestingly, only four of the combinations are valid choices for the second participant, and each one "beats" two others. THH beats HHH and HHT, HHT beats HTH and HTT, and you get the other sets by swapping each H for T and vice versa.

Wolverine vs Sabretooth

2009-04-30T22:57:00.002+01:00

Saw X-Men Origins: Wolverine last night. It's very daft, but I enjoyed it anyway. And I'm not going to review it! It's my blog, and I'll do what I like.

Instead, I'm going to discuss my favourite aspect of Wolverine - his nemesis, Sabretooth.

What makes a good nemesis? I think there's a basic acceptance that the main requirement is that the nemesis will share the hero's most significant traits. This, Sherlock Holmes and the Doctor both have nemeses with super-intelligence, Spider-Man has lots of animal-based villains, Iron Man has a number of armoured villains, et cetera.

But I think that, in my ideal view of nemeses, there's a second prerequisite - when they get together, they have to fight. Maybe it's a battle of wits, maybe fisticuffs, but if they're capable of joining forces for a greater good, then they're not proper nemeses in my view.

Wolverine and Sabretooth, at best, offer the strongest example of this, since they're both animalistic, aggressive and strong. The first fight between them in the first X-Men film was magnificent, because there's no explanation for why they're fighting - instantly, we accept that they're nemeses, and that's why they fight.

Their relationship in Origins is basically the same, but they're brothers (or were raised as such - we arrived late, so I missed the start). This relationship diminishes their dynamic, since there's now more of a reason for their fighting.

Still plenty of fighting between the two, though, so I'm pleased. I'm easily pleased.

Being Human

2009-03-01T21:50:00.002Z

Have you been watching Only Human? I hope you have. It's brilliant, you see. Those with access to iPlayer can still watch the whole series (six episodes), so here are seven reasons why this niche BBC3 show deserves a wider audience.

1 - A werewolf, a vampire and a ghost rent a house.

The central concept. What's not to love? I saw the adverts for the pilot last year, and assumed this was a sitcom. It isn't - indeed, at times, it's pitch black - but this drama does have a lot of laugh-out-loud moments, and the highlights are always the central three characters sitting around in their house, having ordinary, everyday conversations.

2 - Russell Tovey

Tovey's a revelation. Hadn't seen him in anything a few years ago, and now he's in everything from Little Dorrit to Doctor Who. And George, the neurotic werewolf in Being Human, is played brilliantly. Very believable, and incredibly sweet.

Werewolves have the short straw in drama, since they're fine for all but one night a month, but Tovey manages to convey the paranoia felt by someone who knows they're never more than four weeks away from becoming a monster.

3 - Lenora Crichlow

Crichlow's a vaguely familiar face (I first came across her in Doctor Who's Gridlock), and she has her work cut out for her in this programme, which is a bit male-heavy at the start of the series. Later episodes remedy this, but Crichlow's absolutely brilliant, bringing a lightness to those early, angsty episodes.

She plays Annie, a ghost, and her story starts slowly - she died in the house that the boys are now renting, and is forced to observe her fianceé moving on with his life without her. I've so far seen up to episode four, and her story - and character - has become more engaging with each one.

4 - Aidan Turner

The least well-known of the main cast, Turner is a revelation. He's got a tough role to play, since redeemed vampires have been seen on-screen more-or-less non-stop for the last decade.

Like the other two, I think it's Turner that manages to transform this potentially-generic character into a charming, lovely character. At no point does Mitchell feel anything like Spike, Angel or any other veggie vampires you might have seen before. Even when facing genero-vampires, Turner manages to keep Mitchell fresh.

5 - Rachel Anthony

I have no idea who Rachel Anthony is. I can't find any information on her anyway. What I do know, though, is that she wrote episode three of this series. And it's superb.

I've already mentioned the angsty, shaky start of the series. This was the episode that convinced me that everything would be alright. It's excellent. All the characters have things to do, with one of the best guest characters to date in the form of a ghost who loves 80s music. He tries to help Annie come to terms with her condition, and the plot weaves in wonderfully unexpected ways.

I find that guest writers can often bring a lot to a series. They can concentrate on a single episode, which are sometimes rewritten by a lead writer. Whatever the system is for Being Human, Anthony's episode is perfectly placed, and finally delivers great moments for the female cast, including some lovely scenes for George's love interest.

6 - Brian Dooley

Brian Dooley created The Smoking Room, which I haven't seen, but I'm familiar with his work from Monkey Dust, a disturbing BBC3 animated sketch show. He also wrote episode four of Being Human. To date, it's the last episode I've seen, and also the strongest. Several very sweet moments, but a lot of pitch black storylines. It has some really striking scenes too, with some exceptional use of music - certainly reminded me of Monkey Dust at several points.

Like Rachel Anthony's episode, it brings a lot to the table, shedding new light on all the characters. Whereas most episodes have followed a pattern of the gang meeting a new character each week, who stays with them for an hour's worth of story, this episode turns the concept on its head, leaving the characters lonelier than ever.

A great standalone episode, made even more exciting for its hints of things to come.

7 - Toby Whithouse

And finally, the creator of the show. I first came across Whithouse when he wrote School Reunion, the Doctor Who episode that featured the return of Sarah Jane. He also wrote the Torchwood episode Greeks Bearing Gifts - in which Toshiko is given an artefact that allows her to hear people's thoughts - and both episodes provided very challenging central concepts. The latter in particular could have been terrible, but both were real highlights of their respective series.

Here, Whithouse uses his talent for presenting sci-fi and fantasy in a grounded, domestic manner to maintain a whole world containing monsters. Not a new concept by a long stretch, but as I hope I've conveyed, I really feel that this offers a totally different look at the idea.

He's a great writer. His dialogue is spot-on, and it's clear from the episodes I've seen that the series is building up to something big. Whithouse himself has penned the final two episodes, and I can't wait.

Hope you all catch up too!

Teetotal

2009-02-22T22:08:00.002Z

I recently gave up drinking alcohol.

My approach has been quite vague thus far. After a big night out of drinking with some colleagues, I woke up with the same two thoughts I always have after such nights out; "what a great night!" and "wow, I feel rubbish!".

Normally, the latter thought fades, and all I can remember is enjoyment. This time, though, I had a feeling that I wouldn't be drinking again for some time. It felt like a natural point to stop.

I'll try to explain. The night had been fun, but it felt at times like it could easily shatter and become awful. As though I were walking on a tightrope. I'm glad that this night was so much fun, and that the night I've started thinking of as My Last Night of Drinking was a happy memory. The alternative - that I stop drinking only after having an appalling night - is not a pleasant thought.

Afterwards, day after day, I felt less like I simply wasn't drinking that day, and more like a Non-Drinker. And it felt nice! Having closed the door on one activity, I'd opened other doors wider. Reading was more fun. Computer games more satisfying. The internet! Look, I'm updating my blog. I've only been doing this since I stopped drinking.

I was quite a late starter when it came to drinking. I hardly drank at all before university, and even then, it wasn't until my second year that I started doing so particularly regularly. Before then, I still went out a lot, but had water if anything. And I enjoyed this!

Alcohol is fun, of course, which I imagine is why I took to it so joyfully ... but it's not as satisfying as not drinking. I have no major reason for giving up, really - just lots of little reasons that I'm quite fond of. Health, social and psychological reasons. I do think not drinking makes me a better person, if only because I always have enough control to be a good person.

And that sounds appallingly self-righteous. I'm not, really. I still love the merriment of alcohol - but I think I can join in the fun perfectly well without drinking it myself. I wouldn't wish for an end to the whole thing, and I will really miss a glass of wine with meals, but for now, I'm perfectly happy to be totally teetotal.

Hay-on-Wye

2009-02-19T22:31:00.003Z

I went to Hay-on-Wye today. Ostensibly for a nice trip to see the lovely bookshops, but I also had a mission. I wanted to find as many Eighth Doctor novels as possible.

Background for the uninitiated. In the 90s, without new Doctor Who episodes on TV, the series continued as original novels. Around half of these were new stories for old Doctors (the Missing Adventures, later the Past Doctor Adventures) and the rest were an ongoing narrative for the present Doctor (the New Adventures - featuring the Seventh Doctor - until the mid-nineties, and afterwards the Eighth Doctor Adventures).

I love this era of Doctor Who. Many high-profile TV writers contributed to the series - including Mark Gatiss, Paul Cornell and Russell T Davies - and they broke loads of new ground.

I missed most of this, as I wasn't aware of the series until half the Eighth Doctor novels had already been released. They're tricky to find, as the demand isn't there to reprint them, so owning the set is difficult indeed. I currently own around a third of them.

Independent bookshops are the place to turn, and Hay-on-Wye is full of them. Today, I set off with my housemate Jom to try and find the rest.

Shop 1

The first shop was tiny, and seemed to sum up the entire area. Books packed everywhere, with a little bit of everything. Two floors, both with enough room for only three or four people to browse comfortably.

They had some Star Wars books, so I was hopeful, but no Doctor Who books. Unsurprising in such a small shop, I suppose.

Shop 2

This shop was bigger, with many more shelves. Indeed, it was difficult to browse if anyone else was checking the same shelf, so narrow were the spaces in-between. So, while Jom examined the beautiful copies of Lord of the Rings, I asked the shopkeeper whether they had any Doctor Who novels.

Apparently not, although they did have a single Torchwood book. This was good news - at least it proved that the books can turn up sometimes. And Jom bought the beautiful Lord of the Rings books.

Shop 3

I loved this shop! There WAS no shopkeeper. You left the money in a box by the door. How brilliant is that? How could anyone be dishonest when this level of trust had been instilled in them?

Sadly, the range of sci-fi books wasn't great. No new Who for me.

Shop 4

"Hello!" greeted the shopkeeper as we entered. This was a first! All the keepers were friendly, but it was still nice to have such a welcome.

A quick search revealed no sci-fi at all. This seemed odd considering the size of the place.

"Have you got any science fiction?" asked Jom.

"Nothing here," explained the keeper. "We have a second shop up the road that has an impressive range."

"Great!" we said, and off we went.

Shop 5

On the way, we found a castle. But wait. Why was it surrounded by bookshelves? Surely not.

But yes! The castle was a bookshop! No Doctor Who books, but then, the shop was smaller than it looked. Most of the castle was a ruin.

Regrettably, this was reflected in the quality of the books outside. Remember when I said "surrounded by bookshelves"? The front lawn was dotted with loads of cheaper books. Indeed, if you check the Wikipedia article on the town, the photo is of these shelves. Years of being outside left the shelves in a shoddy condition, but the books were even worse.

These shelves weren't restacked when books sold. There was no order to the books. And they were all damp and torn. It was a depressing sight.

Shop 6

This was a lovely shop. Like many shops in the area, it packed books in EVERYWHERE - the cellar, the upper floor, and along the stairs.

Yes, that's right. As you're walking up the stairs, you're also browsing the books. And wonderfully, there were Doctor Who books on these stair-shelves! Result!

Mind you, only one was an Eighth Doctor Adventure - specifically, The Gallifrey Chronicles, the last of the 73 novels in the series. Still, they also had Fear Itself - it also features the Eighth Doctor, but published as a Past Doctor Adventure as the new TV series had started by then. I bought these and another seven Past Doctor Adventures. A great haul!

Pub Lunch

I decided that it'd be nice to have lunch on a high, so we found a nice pub for a meal. Remarkably, the pub we found had only started offering food on this very day. Amazing luck! If we'd been a day early, we couldn't have had food here at all. It was good food as well. Must find out what all these places were called.

Shop 7

Remember when Shop 4 told us they had a great sci-fi range in their second shop? This was that shop.

Their sci-fi range had a room to itself. It was covered in nerdy signs that I didn't understand. One said "The Doctor flies by TARDIS - why don't you?" I mean, I know a fair bit about this series, and I still can't work out what this means.

Worst of all, they didn't have any Doctor Who books! Actually, I lie - they had Target novels.

Let me explain. Back in the 60s and 70s, repeats of Doctor Who were very rare indeed. Especially since the 60s episodes only existed in black and white. And these were the days before video players, so the only way to experience these older stories were to buy these novels. They'd sometimes be written by the writers of the original stories, or otherwise by former producer Terrence Dicks, or Ian Marter, who played companion Harry Sullivan.

For a certain generation, the books hold more memories than the episodes themselves. For me, a fan from the video-filled 90s, they hold few memories, and little appeal. Here, they mocked me by proving that there was a dedicated Doctor Who section, and that no Eighth Doctor Adventures were available.

Shop 8

This shop - called The Sensible Bookshop - was quite small, and had two floors. Jom was excited. He'd been in this shop before, years ago. He phoned me, because there was such a high number of Doctor Who books.

These were, like in Shop 6, kept along the stairs. Sadly, today, they were mostly Target novels ... but there was one Eighth Doctor story! The Banquo Legacy! Joy for all.

Spoiler: This was the last book I bought today. No other shops had Doctor Who books. But I'll tell you about them anyway.

Shop 9 sold new books. A bit incongruous, since a few other shops sold new books too, and the appeal of the place was mostly the fact that they had independent bookshops selling second-hand books.

Shop 10 was an enormous place. Felt like a level from Perfect Dark, with its four floors and multiple routes.

Shop 11 sold kids' books exclusively. It had a few Doctor Who books, but they were the new hardback ones. Oddly, it also placed plastic jackets on all the books, making the whole place look like a library. Seriously, books look ugly in these jackets.

Shop 12 was mental. It looked like a tiny house, made up of three rooms, that had been adapted into a shop. It was down an avenue that Jom and I had already walked past once. Inside, the owner - a man in his 60s with a beard - asked immediately if he could help, without bothering to say hello. I told him what I was looking for, and he entered a cupboard-sized enclosure, and pulled a curtain across.

When he opened it again, I saw that there were only two cardboard boxes inside, but miraculously, he'd found three Targets and a Dalek annual from 1965.

How had he managed this? There couldn't have been more than a few hundred books in the shop itself. The boxes weren't huge. I'd been in plenty of big shops without any Doctor Who books at all. What were the odds of these two boxes containing any? Why hadn't he unpacked them? Very odd indeed.

Shop 13 was an antique bookshop. The oldest Eighth Doctor book being 12 this year, I decided this wasn't the place for me.

Shop 14 wasn't so much a shop as it was a tent. It seemed to contain books too unexciting to be contained in a shop. Again, no rhyme or reason to their ordering.

Shop 15 looked like a library. We had to hand in our bags at the door, and the place was cavernous. I found it a bit much, to be honest. With so many books, it was difficut to focus on individual ones. I much prefered the smaller shops, which managed to display their whole range in a managable way. Plus, they didn't take my bag away like Nazis.

Shop 16 was huge as well, but much friendlier. The girl serving assured me that there were definitely Doctor Who books somewhere, but I went through the whole place, and I couldn't find them. Not even in the huge theology section.

Either way, Jom chose to stay here for a while, so I quickened the pace.

Shop 17 - called Murder and Mayhem - was a shop dedicated to crime and horror. Beautifully decorated.

Shop 18 wasn't so much a shop as it was an alley. It was called the Book Passage. A couple entered while I was there, the man saying "I'm going to take you up the Book Passage!". Classy.

Shop 19 was a poetry shop, but it did also offer "literature and an ice chamber". At this point, all thought of Doctor Who novels fled my mind. What on earth is an ice chamber? Why would there be one in a poetry shop?

The truth was not what I expected. The shop seemed normal enough. I headed downstairs to see the "literature". There was a narrow corridor that kept twisting, with books on shelves to the right. At the end, the architecture changed to a distinctly more gothic style. The "ice chamber" seemed to be an enormous dark room, which you could see into via a round hole sealed by iron bars. A prison? A dungeon? I escaped too quickly to learn more, I'm afraid.

The library was my next stop. Not a shop, I know, but libraries are magical places, and it seemed wrong to come to a town that worshipped books and forgo the library. Sadly, it was a bit rubbish. Very small, and they'd dedicated too much space to DVDs and things. Still, I suppose with so many indie bookshops, you'd have to turn to other media to compete.

Shop 20 was nice, with little "rooms" made from shelves for each section. Too small to have very many sections, though, so sci-fi shared with fantasy, children's and, weirdly, philosophy.

Shop 21 was actually number 21 in the street. A sign!, I thought, since I'd been counting the shops in my mind all along. Surely this will deliver! But no. All books were factual. Sad news.

At this point, Elanor arrived with her mother, so we all met up for an end-of-day piece of chocolate cake and drinks. I had a lemonade with lime - thanks for asking - and showed off the ten Doctor Who books I'd found. An average of one in every two shops, I suppose.

So, what have we learned? It's difficult to know why there were so few of these books. There were loads of Star Trek, Star Wars and X-Files novels. Maybe interest in those franchises have waned, while Doctor Who's new series has catapulted it to new heights. Maybe other Doctor Who fans have had the same idea that I did, and have already cleared the area of these books.

Still, some questions remain unanswered. How easily available are these books elsewhere? Will the popular new series significantly increase their rarity?

And why is it that they're only ever kept on staircases?

I'm Nice

2009-02-16T23:29:00.002Z

I've been thinking about niceness a lot recently.

At heart, I think I'm basically nice. I mean, I know I behave quite nicely. I'm polite. I have morals, which I abide by. I'm honest.

My problem is whether behaving nicely is the same as being nice. Am I inherently nice, and behaving in a way that reflects this? Or am I just like every selfish, nasty human being, managing against all odds to keep up an effective facade?

I'm not that cynical, of course. I think everyone has the potential to go either way. Certain traits come naturally. Selfishness and laziness are, I think, the basic instincts of humans. Both need to be overcome to be nice - but the same is true of being nasty.

Most people aren't nasty, because being nasty requires effort (and we're too lazy for that) and puts us at risk (and we're too selfish for that). Being nice also requires effort, and requires us to constantly consider others.

Anyway, I have two main concerns that make me worry that I'm not as nice as I could be:

1) Bad habits. Alright, everyone has them, but I think that genuinely nice people try to overcome them. I've given up alcohol for the time being, to see how it suits me. I have a reunion this weekend, and a birthday the next weekend, so we'll see how long this lasts. I do feel better, though, for knowing that I'm striving to better myself.

2) I'm nice to bad people. I'm not sure whether this makes me a good person (because I'm nice despite their badness) or a bad person (because I'm not making a stand for what I believe). I think this is a case of laziness (it's so hard trying to change bad people) and selfishness (they'd probably be annoyed if I tried).

Reset

2009-02-14T19:04:00.002Z

I'm restarting this blog, but I'm stopping this chapters and structure nonsense. I shall write about whatever I like, because I'm like that.

This is a very meta post. This is probably a bad thing. I'm not that fond of discussing "blogging" and the like. But I thought I would anyway, so that any and all readers are aware of where I stand.

I joined Twitter recently. It's nice hearing people's opinions in such a concise way.

I wonder if this blog still automatically exports entries as notes to Facebook. I hope so. I do check Facebook, you see. If you're reading this on Facebook, feel free to leave a note! I may even tag some people in it. The ones who've requested more notes and blogging from me. Why am I saying this? By the time you read this, you'll already be tagged.

Anyway. Hello!

Chapter Twelve: PKMN.NET 2K7

2007-09-10T15:36:00.000+01:00

I shan't bother with set-up for this story, despite the myriad of great anecdotes that cropped up along the way (being told off for causing noise pollution by a very camp man, seeing a fat man behaving unprofessionally in a game shop, finally getting a dog with issues to trust me – just some of the great stories I shan't be elaborating upon in this entry). So, to what really matters – the PKMN.NET London Meeting!

Elanor and I arrived at Paddington at around eleven o' clock. We were to be met there by Jeroen, a dutch administrator of the site. The most recent picture I'd seen of him was about five years old. And vice versa. Somehow, we found each other – mostly, I think, because we saw each other and realised that we were both demonstrating the same bewildered expression.

And so began the first Real Life interaction with another administrator of the website. Jeroen can come across as quite intimidating online, particularly to those who don't know him that well – he's strict about the rules, always strives for perfection, and has no time for anyone who makes the forums less fun than they could otherwise be.

In everyday life, however, he's friendly, engaging, and a real laugh. I mean, he actually DID laugh! Since he chooses not to use the time-honoured "lol" acronym online, or to literally type "haha", it's easy to forget that typing away at the keyboard is someone who obviously does find things funny. I think I learnt a lot about everyone I met that day, finally seeing the real human being behind the writings, but Jeroen was certainly the one I feel I understood the most at the end of the day.

Next, we headed for Euston to meet Mike. This was exciting – Jeroen had lists and everything, so we could finally talk in more detail about the day's events and plans. It was also great to realise that since this was a gathering of Pokémon fans, I could get excited about little things like a DS advert on the tube, knowing that Jeroen would understand.

Mike wasn't much different to what I'd expected, though he was quieter than I'd thought. He's chatty online, and very enthusiastic about things. Though I know he enjoyed the meeting (I spoke to him online afterwards), at the time I wasn't so sure if he had. Nerves, maybe, or not quite expecting people there to be what they were. Either way, though, it was great talking to him, and again, I think I learned a fair bit about him simply from spending time with the real him.

James arrived shortly afterwards. Of everyone, James was most similar to what I'd expected. In fact, I'd go as far as to say he was exactly the same. He's the one I've known online the longest – since he was thirteen, and I believe he's now twenty – and during that time, he's been very open about his thoughts and his life, with a very honest blog and several video blogs on YouTube. The latter videos were the best example of what he's actually life, as he can very quickly whip out a performance when necessary, whether as a leader, a presenter or a blogger.

Next we met Rex. Rex was the admin I knew the least, since for starters, he's one of the newest (along with Phil, who couldn't make it), and also since I've been offline for so long. Still, he's been a member of the forums for many years, so I've always been aware of who he is, and he was very similar in everyday life to his online portrayal. That said, though, he did wander off a lot. He once got lost and ended up on the London Eye! Alright, near the London Eye, but that's not as good a story. Anyway, he seemed to have really enjoyed the meeting when I spoke to him online later, and if anything, I hope it'll be a good chance for us to get to know each other better, having had a pretty good proper introduction.

And so, thinking ourselves the coolest guys and gal in town, we all made our way to Hyde Park.

Before I continue, I must apologise to any members whose names I get wrong, or any I omit entirely. It was a very busy day, and a lot of hectic and frantic things happened. Feel free to leave a note if I've forgotten you, and I'll edit this article, delete the comment, and pretend it never happened.

When we arrived, we found one lad hanging around – we approached him, thinking he looked like he was waiting for someone, and it turned out he was Lapras King, a member of the forums. We excitedly introduced ourselves, and all of a sudden, a dozen others turned up – some alone, some in pairs, some in groups. We grabbed some drinks, and made our way to a nice shaded area, where everyone settled down, ready for the meeting proper.

All the administrators apart from Mike gave a quick introductory speech, welcoming everyone to the meeting, and encouraging them to enjoy. I shan't give away more, since the speeches were filmed, and are bound to turn up on YouTube soon enough. Either way, it was a really nice feeling, being with such a large group of people who enjoyed their time at the site so much that they wanted to meet the faces behind the usernames. Everyone was really nice, too – as far as I could tell, we had no creepy stalkers in the group.

Next, we all began to relax. I got to check out some modern Pokémon cards – I collected them briefly around a decade ago, but they're all bookmarks by now – and some of them were in foreign languages, excitingly enough. Turns out Haunter's French name is Spectrum.

After everyone settled down, the admins delivered their speeches - everyone but Mike, who isn't a fan of public speaking, and Phil, who wasn't there. James's was very much in his style, with plenty of political gags and quirky turns of phrases. Jeroen's was very exciting, since he got to deliver the news that two of our moderators would be promoted to global moderator status - the difference between checking some individual forums and being able to take care of the whole lot. One of the two who were promoted - Mushroom - was present at the meet, and got to accept the position face to face. Rex's speech was very interesting to me, since his time as an admin at the site has mostly overlapped with my time away. Finally, I delivered my speech. I thought it was pretty good, but having watched it back on YouTube, I'm not so certain. Either way, my aim was to make sure that everyone went out of their way to have a good time, and not be too shy, but actually, most people had already thrown themselves into the meet.

We spent hours in the park, discussing all aspects of Pokémon, filming interviews and trailers for the site, trading and battling in the game, and some people played football. I was asked for my autograph at one point ... but only because everyone was, since a girl named Kit wanted a page containing everyone's signitures. Wonder if she was a credit card thief.

So, after a great afternoon, we headed for Leicester Square. I believe it's most famous for film premiers, but since we're not celebrities, and the current premier was Knocked Up, we decided to skip the red carpet and move straight on to Pizza Hut. Another lazy hour or so sitting around and chatting, and we were once again ready to move on. Several people had to leave at this point, and the rest of us headed for Westminster.

I hadn't actually been to Westminster before, so this was an interesting experience. We got to see guards with guns outside Downing Street, comment on how short Big Ben looks close up, and wonder whether there'd ever be a giant rollercoaster to accompany the giant big wheel that is the London Eye. We also saw the location of the hospital that ended up on the moon in Doctor Who.

Either way, we found an all-purpose entertainment place, with computer games and pool and all sorts, but naturally headed for the bar. Had a drink there, although it took us an embarassingly long time to realise that Rex wasn't with us. With all the people who'd gone home, we hadn't wondered why he group seemed too small. Turns out he was still on Westminster bridge - though I can't be certain, I suspect he was wondering if draining the Thames would be possible, like in Doctor Who and the Fantastic Four.

After finally finding him again, we headed for stations for various people to go home. A fair few stayed around, but Elanor and I needed to get back. And so ended the first ever PKMN.NET meet.

Chapter Eleven: The Interview

2007-09-09T15:05:00.000+01:00

Before I begin, I'm afraid I've got some rather upsetting news. I have stayed up beyond midnight without a decent reason, and the Midnight Counter has had to be reset. I managed to keep it up for 23 consecutive nights, and naturally, I'll now be trying to beat that score.

But, with such a backlog of topics to discuss, I shan't be updating on my personal goals until I've actually caught up with myself.

As before, this is old news by now, but my interview took place on the 23rd of July. It was a pretty strange experience, since it took place in the office, so it was as though I'd come in to work and, for some reason, was wearing a suit, and everyone there was silent.

I had forty-five minutes to translate three test pieces; two of them English, one of them Welsh. The second piece took the longest, and halfway through, I moved on to the final piece, thinking that it'd be better to try all of them rather than complete some and not even begin the other, since they'd be wanting to see something different in each piece. As it happens, though, I did finish them all - in the nick of time.

Three of us were already working in the unit, but four applicants were external. I imagine this was probably a disadvantage to them in terms of the tests, since we got to use our own PCs for the tests, whereas the others would have had no prior experience of using those specific computers.

After a break of about ten minutes, (in which I read my fresh copy of Doctor Who Magazine), it was time for the interview itself.

In preperation, I'd made a list of everything I wanted to mention. IT skills, reasons for wanting the job, opinions on how it should be done, all sorts of things. The first thing that happened when I entered the room was that I was given a list of the five questions they'd be asking. Only five! Wow, I was overprepared.

So, I spent a few minutes putting reminders of what I wanted to say and where. There was no IT question, so I plonked that in another question. They didn't ask about secrecy or confidentiality, so I mentioned that as part of a question asking what one should take into consideration when starting a piece of translation.

I talked solidly for about half an hour, on matters ranging from tone, audience and syntax to teamwork, prioritising and deadlines. All in all, I was very happy with my performance.

I didn't get the job; they went to the two trainee translators, who'd been there for about three years, waiting for this promotion. So, fingers crossed that I'll get one of their positions when I apply for those. Interview's in October!

Chapter Ten: Mew - Part Two

2007-09-03T22:40:00.000+01:00

Apologies for the lack of updates again. As ever, that's indicative of the sheer amount of things that have happened since the last one.

Anyway, last time we spoke, I was geared up to go to Bristol. We now join our adventurers - me and Elanor - on the road, headed for that very city. And being an idiot, I've forgotten to check where exactly we need to go. But Cribbs Causeway rings a bell, so we're just going to go for it!

(Why is this entry being written in present tense? For a change, I tell you!)

We arrive in Bristol, and wander around for a while, assuming there'd be signs for Cribbs Causeway. After all, we thought, why else would people come to Bristol? Turns out there's a whole host of reasons, including a zoo, and a cul-de-sac. I mention the cul-de-sac, because that's where we end up, our only confirmation that Cribbs Causeway even exists being that a bus was headed there. We did consider following the bus, but couldn't reach it in time.

I spot one of the many friendly locals for which Bristol is famous, and ask her where Cribbs Causeway is. After sharing an expression of deepest sympathy, she tells me that it'd take me forty minutes to get there by bus. Knowing I've already missed the bus makes matters worse, and I ask for directions. She gives directions to get halfway, deeming those to be complicated enough for the time being, and tells me to ask someone else when I get there. That's right - she ended her directions on a cliff-hanger! And we all know how annoying those can be. Especially those who read my previous entry.

So, we head off again, following the instructions - which were, if memory serves, drive through the cool city until you get to the prettiest place in the world, then follow the road around a lovely park until you get to a picturesque village. I wonder whether Cribbs Causeway was actually really close, but she wanted to show off Bristol.

We get to the end of the directions, and I find another friendly-looking local. I chase him, and ask for directions, and as I do so, I spot a shocking sight. The bus from before! I run back to the car, and the chase begins. I say "chase". It was more of a leisurely drive.

Finally, we arrive at Cribbs Causeway. Turns out it's not strictly in Bristol, which is why there were no signs in Bristol itself. No point in advertising the competition, after all. There are several car parks, and we choose the one with the most cars - after all, they must all be here for Mew, right?

We find a map, and search for the main shopping centre. We enter, and try to find a map. This sounds a bit like narrating a Dungeons and Dragons game, doesn't it? Not that I'd know what that sounds like. Moving swiftly on. No Toys R Us on the top floor ... and none on the ground floor. Gutted. That's all the floors.

We exit via Marks and Spencer (which isn't just a shop - it's an M&S shop), and find that Toys R Us is, in fact, an enormous building, which only an idiot could have failed to notice.

When we get there, the queue for Mew (read that aloud!) is out through the door, having already wormed its way through the front of the shop. Fortunately, the latest Pokémon games have a wireless option, so we all mess around with that, meeting tiny computer game versions of other people in the queue. Elanor and I are between a group of teenagers, discussing the pros and cons of various attacks and items within the game in a competitive environment, and a group of kids talking excitedly about legendary Pokémon.

Finally, when we get to the front of the queue, we get our Mews (two each! One per game), and head for food. Sorry if that was an anti-climatic story - there was a face-painting stall, but we chose to forego it. Much though I wanted a face like a Wobbuffet.

A Pizza Hut later, and we're back on the road, and headed to see our friend Grace. How I've failed to mention Grace before, I don't know. Y'know - beyond the fact that I so rarely see her, with her living in Bristol. But Grace is great - an intelligent and mature lass who doesn't bat an eyelid at the fact that we've travelled this distance for the sake of a computer game with a fanbase that's 99.6% child.

When we arrive, Elanor manages to endear herself permanently to Grace's mother by getting down on the floor with their enormous dog, playing and stroking. And I spend more time than is decent speculating on whether a bit of my thumb I cut off while cooking a few days earlier would grow back.

(Spoiler - turned out I'd only cut the skin, so it did grow back.)

We chat and play paper-based games, before having a lovely meal, and then we head out for milk. On the way back, Grace asks me if I remember her mentioning a friend of hers who loves Doctor Who. And I do.

So I'll take a break here to explain this in more detail. I met Grace in December 2004, a few months before the new series of Doctor Who began. We quickly realised that we both liked the old series, and since then, it's formed a strong basis of a great amount of discussion. My own passion and history with the programme is best saved for another entry, but Grace was introduced to it when she was young by a boy who lived nearby. She'd often mentioned that I really should meet him.

Meanwhile, back in Bristol, Grace realises that I really should meet him right now. And a good thing, too, since it turns out he's just about to move out of this house. Anyway, Elanor and Grace decide to find out who's the biggest Doctor Who nerd, so we head into his bedroom for a quiz! Though it's very unlikely that his girlfriend is reading this, I do apologise for hi-jacking your evening - possibly your last in that house - for a nerdy Doctor Who quiz.

Anyway, I win with ease (well, actually, I don't - but it's my blog, and so I get to write the history), and we eventually move on, ready to head for home.

And so, we have reached the end of the Quest for Mew, that strange two-part entry that laughably went into present tense despite the entry breaking the record for most time passed between the event itself and the entry that followed. Next up - Celebi! Hopefully. Please.

Chapter Ten: Mew - Part One

2007-08-21T17:59:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 21 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.
Breakfast Eaten on Work Days: 6/6.

Apologies for not updating in nearly a week - it's been a busy time. Fortunately, busy times mean blog fodder. Or "blodder", if you prefer.

I'm afraid I'm going to talk about Pokémon again. Wait, don't leave! I swear, I'll talk about a trip to the outside world later on.

As you may or may not know, a part of the emphasis in the series is put on "Catching 'Em All". That is, getting your hands on one of each Pokémon, at least once. Since each new generatin of games brings brand-new Pokémon into the mix, this can be a hard task. Indeed, in Pokémon Sapphire - a game I've owned for around five years - I was still two short of getting all 386. And thanks to the new games, Diamond and Pearl, there are now 493 in total!

Problem is, some Pokémon aren't easily available. Some require one to attend specially-organised events. One such event was for the mega-rare Pokémon Mew - a creature I've never, at any point, owned personally. Being one of the two I needed for Sapphire, not to mention one of hundreds I need for Pearl, it was time to head for Bristol.

("Bristol?!", I hear you cry. "But you said there was one in Cardiff in a previous entry!" Well, yes, but I decided to go to Bristol instead, you see, as we had to pick up Elanor's parents on the day of the Cardiff event. But look, I'll talk about that in due course, so do let me continue the story.)

I spent the weekend in Newport with Elanor. On Friday night, her friend Alyx (mentioned in entries covering a previous trip to Newport) came round, and we played a variety of board games. One we played was Trivial Pursuit. I'd never much liked the game before - probably since I have some rather competitive relatives - but playing in a relaxed atmosphere, more about having fun than following the so-called "rules", was greatly enjoyable.

We then played the Game of Life. I'd never played it before, and did very well considering it was my first try - ended up with £888,000 and two kids. Elanor managed no kids, and didn't even get the racehorse she wanted. Alyx managed to change careers twice - once after being fired, and once after a mid-life crisis.

Then we played Mouse Trap. Oh, alright then - we built the trap and set it off. Then we played MASH, determining that Elanor and I would live in a mansion, paid for by my job as a paper boy and hers as a prostitute, with Jom as best man, and a really stupid girl (who shall remain nameless to protect, well, me) as a bridesmaid. Alyx's future seemed similarly bleak, though oddly feasible. I shan't go into detail, to avoid offending her potential husband-to-be, bridesmaid, and thirty-seven children.

The following day, we collected Elanor's parents from London. Lots of driving was involved. I also spent £6.13 on a sausage sandwich. I think I'd rather not talk about it.

But! As I mentioned before, Elanor's parents had been to the US. Oh, the tales they had to tell! Tales of Comic-Con, the tallest tree in the world, seeing Heroes being filmed, a right-wing library with footage of Margaret "Davros" Thatcher, an art-loving lizard, a labourer who talked to himself and the desert from Galaxy Quest.

And this entry's being ended on a cliffhanger! Will I go to Bristol? Will I get a Mew? Will Nintendo EVER have a UK event to give us Celebi? All these questions will be answered ... now. Yes, yes, and if they don't, I'll be writing them a strongly-worded letter.

Chapter Nine: Cyberlife

2007-08-14T23:34:00.001+01:00

Midnight Counter: 14 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.
Breakfast Eaten on Work Days: 4/4.

As I've probably made clear elsewhere in this blog, I'm very comfortable with the idea of spending time in an online society. Indeed, I think it can be a very social environment, and offer a different insight into what makes people tick.

I spent most of yesterday indoors, so I had a fair amount of time to chat to people online. These varied from real-life friends, to old online contacts, to brand-new people I'd barely met. Since I've done little else that's noteworthy since my last entry, I thought I'd talk a bit about my life online. In flashback form! It spans a decade, so hold on to your horses.

(Also, I started writing this last night, and accidentally published it half-finished. Apologies to anyone who somehow got hold of this half-finished version - you're being cheated out of an entry today, I'm afraid).

1997

This is when we got the internet for the first time. I say "we" - I'm of course referring to my family. It was very much a family event as well. My mother, brother and I all gathered around the PC, and saw what the internet meant.

This was a very old PC. The one time I tried to access the world wide web (I think I may have been looking up Mr Bean), I realised the computer's shortcomings. It took ages to load all the pictures, and when they'd loaded, the colours were all wrong. But that was fine, because I'd found something that was, in my opinion, far superior - Virgin Chat!

(The internet was supplied by Virgin. Hence "Virgin Chat". Not whatever YOU might have been thinking, you filthy loons.)

The idea was pretty simple. Users of Virgin could enter the chatroom, and just talk. The idea, I think, was for new internet users to get some help, work out what to do - that sort of thing. But with such a rubbish computer, this was the best thing ever. Simple, stripped-down - text-based. In the absense of any pictures or facial experessions, chatters had taken to making faces out of punctuation - :-), :-(, :-D and the like - and used acronyms to denote laughter or such - like "lol". I remember that "lol" became a big thing for me, because it's also Welsh for "nonsense". I used to astound denizens of the chatroom with my cool linguistic knowledge. Handy, too, since my English wasn't particularly strong at the time.

And then something amazing happened. I was talking to a random chatter, told her my cool lol-related fact, and she ALREADY KNEW! "How did she know?" I hear you ask. Because she could speak Welsh!

Turns out her name was Lowri, and she was from south-east Wales. We started talking regularly, and exchanged e-mails too. I mention this because I feel that Lowri was the first friend I made online. Alright, we weren't exactly best friends forever or anything, but it did mean that I started to realise that you could, in fact, have friends that you never met.

And I've fooled you into thinking the end to this story's going to be written here. In fact, I already wrote it last month.

1998

Having learnt that one could, in fact, meet and befriend like-minded people on the internet without ever having to even know what they look like, I later discovered a better means of doing this. You see, although sharing an Internet Service Provider is a good start to having things in common, better still was having interests in common.

Remember those Animorphs books? They were about kids who became animals fighting asexual enemies who could possess people. Anyway, I found that I really liked them. To this day, in fact, I think they've got an awful lot going for them as kids' books.

Anyway, someone had set up a mailing list for Animorphs fanfiction. For those not in the know, fanfiction is when you write stories based on an existing franchise. I'd never heard of it at the time, but I liked the idea of having more Animorphs stories to read. Although I didn't really get to know anyone on the mailing list particularly well, it was interesting to note that other people who liked what you liked tended to make great company.

And you'll be glad to know the group still exists! Which means I can quote a bit from some fanfiction I wrote:

It took a bit of doing but we eventually acquired a duck morph each.
"Uh...Marco? It's bread! How can anybody divide a loaf of bread into five equal parts?" I said.
After a bit of studying, we found that a duck was the only creature capable of fitting through the hole AND moving the box inside.

And my first ever review:

are you a beginner,if so it was good for a beginner,except a little bit to
much confusing.

1999

Mailing lists were fun, but a bit of a hassle. But it turned out that there was a better discussion system in place - Usenet! It's a system of what's known as newsgroups, developed in the late 70s, where people can discuss almost anything, depending on the specific newsgroup. For those familiar with forums, imagine them without anything other than text, and you've got Usenet. For anyone unfamiliar with forums, it's basically multiplayer Notepad.

I shan't own up to the early newsgroups I joined, as my contributions were embarassing at best. But my fondness for Usenet co-incided with a couple of incredible developments in the wordl. In June of this year, I read two new books that had been released - chronicling the first two years of one boy's life at school. That's right - it's everyone's favourite orphan, Harry James Potter! I also got my hands on a new computer game called Pokémon Blue.

As quickly as I could, I learnt everything there was to know about these things. And there's a LOT to know; one a deceptively deep series of books, the other a deceptively deep series of computer games. And the guys on Usenet knew it all. They could quote the books backwards, and knew all the Pokémon statistics by heart.

By now, I saw the internet as a place to learn in an hour what could've taken months of analysis or trial and error.

For fun, here's my prediction on the Pokémon newsgroup, when I'd just started posting, of whether there'd ever be a 3D RPG:

I doubt they'd be able to do that. Most N64 games are around £50, and not many people would bother paying for a game that's just a 3D version of a GB game. And anyway, how would you trade PKMN between carts...?

2000

Something terrible happened in 2000. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire was released just as my week of work experience was beginning. Unable to access the group until I'd finished the book, I spent my online time doubly redoubling my Pokémon research. By now, the second generation of games had been released, and there was much more to learn.

I typed "Pokémon" into Google, and fate (or rather, a webmaster being anal enough to use "é" rather than "e") brought me to a website called Pokémon UK. It was looking for staff. Hang on - I've already told this story.

But this was when everything finally came together. Not only was I part of a site dedicated to something I loved, but I'd found a use for the copious amounts of information I'd picked up. I downloaded a new and exciting product called MSN Messenger to talk to the other staff members - in real time! - which also gave me access to plenty of other users, from schoolmates to, well, the aforementioned Lowri again.

2001

This was when I joined the PokéWars!. The PokéWars! deserves an entry all of its own at some stage, but the idea is that it's interactive fanfiction. Each writer has a limited amount of characters, and can interact with other writers/characters. I'm still a part of this to this day - while interest in the PokéWars! has died down somewhat over the years, there are still several writers left, and new Pokémon games often breathe new life into it.

It was at around this time that a lot of my schoolmates became interested in messengers and the like as well. I'm sure plenty had had similar experiences to me, but some were brand new to it, and it was strange how many perfectly well-adjusted chaps would end up in bizarre situations, like developing a crush on someone they'd never met. While I'm a strong advocate of online friendships, I think that successful online relationships are very rare indeed, and to actively seek one out seemed very, very strange.

2002

Pokémon UK exploded. It's hard to pinpoint when exactly this happened, but if memory serves, 2002 was when I noticed it. The site stopped being a minor project, and became an enormous hub of activity. We eventually rebranded it as PKMN.NET, to avoid being seen as a UK-only site. It'd continue to grow in size and popularity over the years.

Which was strange to me, since it had been a site on such a small scale for such a long time. It didn't quite register that I was part of something with such potential, and I'd never spent much time on the forums, so as it grew, I remained blissfully unaware of it.

Indeed, despite the website's success, I spent far less time online in 2002 than I had in years. The advent of free lessons in sixth form and Being Old Enough To Do Things (even if that DID just mean going to Laserzone later at night) took my attention away from the internet.

2003

It was in this year that I got Pokémon Sapphire, part of the third generation of Pokémon games. A lot of research needed to be done, a lot of content written ... it was mostly being done by other people. PKMN.NET was by now so popular that there was no shortage of people to write about the content, and I ended up researching far less elsewhere - the information was already here.

2004

At this point, I went to University. Actually, in 2004, I'd already been in University for three or four months, but it was in the new year that the internet became relevant - I had the internet in my hall of residence, and I revisited the PokéWars! with a renewed passion, as well as getting back into the swing of messengers.

Really, the whole thing becomes a boring story at this stage, since my days of discovery were behind me, and with the rest of University looming, the 'net was becoming more of a tool.

2005

Indeed, in 2005, I'd just started going out with Elanor, and Doctor Who returned to TV. Naturally, I had no need for the internet.

2006

Nope, not in 2006 either.

2007

Ah! But 2007's a different story. 2007's a cooler year, too. Facebook came along, for starters. For those not in the know, Facebook's a networking site mainly aimed at University students, with the emphasis on sharing photographs. It has plenty of other purposes - indeed, my own Facebook account leeches all these blog entries into its own note system (hello, everyone readying this via Facebook! Do leave a note if you ARE reading, since I'm not sure if anyone bothers reading the Facebook notes).

So now the internet was encouraging me to Get Out, Have a Life, and Post Pictures of said life. A fine message to send indeed! Except for the last part, which is a bit geeky.

And by today, two-thirds into the glorious year that is 2007, despite having a lot on the go, I've found the perfect balance with the internet. A bit of dedication to specific causes - this blog, for one, and I've returned to the PokéWars! - but without forgetting to have a life in the meantime, and the 'net can be a wonderful place with some very strange experiences to offer.

Chapter Eight: A Boys' Day Out - Part Two

2007-08-12T13:56:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 12 consecutive nights.

Yesterday saw a very succesful Boys' Day Out, as I'd hoped, although I arrived home at 11:40pm, so the Midnight Counter wouldn't allow me to write about it last night.

The previous entry provides any context you may need. So don't come running to me when you don't know who Phresh is.

Anyway, Jom picked up James and I (incidentally, James is also known as Millywiggz, whom I mentioned in my very first entry), and we headed for James's new student house in town. He hadn't unpacked yet, but we got to see his room and the living room, and met one or two of his new housemates. They seemed very pleasant; James hadn't met them before moving in, so they could have been dreadful, but hopefully they're every bit as friendly as they seemed.

Phresh arrived soon enough, though Emyr had to go to Cardiff to get something at the last minute, and would have to be late.

We headed into town, since Jom wanted to buy a few things, and we caught up with what we'd been up to. It was great seeing Phresh in particular, since it'd been so long since I'd spoken to him last. Eventually, we decided to walk to Lewis's house, since it wasn't too far. We stayed in Singleton Park for a bit, and I spoke to Phresh about Fun Fridays. I think he pretty much saw my point, and since he's pretty easy-going, I imagine he'll be up for it.

(What do you mean, "what are Fun Fridays?" I already told you - the previous entry provides context. Honestly, I've even called them Parts One and Two ...)

Getting to Lewis's house was a strange experience, as it always is. I spent a lot of time there during primary school, but with everyone making new friends and forming bigger groups in secondary school, I barely went there at all. It has, however, remained practically identical to how it looked a decade ago.

Once again, we did a lot of talking, and during this time, Emyr turned up. Emyr's great to have around, especially for conversations, since he's very intelligent, knows an awful lot of things and has some fascinating opinions. Even in the hour or so we all spent chatting then, he shed an interesting light on such topics as news coverage, poverty in New York, the exchange rate, and Madeliene McCann.

Although Emyr had to leave quite early, the rest of us decided to seek out food. I'd left my wallet in James's house, thinking we'd return after a brief visit to town, so Jom offered to pay for my meal. This may seem unblogworthy even by the most liberal of standards, but it ought to serve as a reminder that I owe him a meal.

We found a new Indian restaurant on Brynmill Road (location given in case you fancy visiting), which offered 10% off for its grand opening. And grand it was! The food was excellent, with an extensive amount of dishes on offer - it felt like more than a local curryhouse, and the prices were reasonable even without the limited offer. And on Sundays, they apparently provide an all-you-can-eat buffet between noon and midnight. Rock on.

We talked about my and Jom's recent holiday to Budapest with the Mads (maybe I should've started my blog back then - I'll just have to write about it in flashback), as well as European beer and the pros and cons of complaining.

Afterwards, we relaxed in James's room for a bit, and talked further.

Looking back over this entry, I notice that it lacks any real insight, and is effectively a long list of what I did with my mates, which will hold little value for anyone else. I think this means that I now count as a proper blogger.

Chapter Eight: A Boys' Day Out - Part One

2007-08-11T11:44:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 11 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.
Breakfast Eaten on Work Days: 3/3.

For those of you concerned about me fasting to get more work done (as implied in my previous entry), I'd best clarify that I didn't actually skip lunch in these cases. We have a two-hour window (12pm - 2pm) where we can take our lunch break at any time. Normally, I start mine between 12:30 and 12:45, but sometimes I wait until later - At the latest, 1:15. But having been instructed of the dangers of repetitive strain injury, I'll do my best to take my breaks more regularly.

More importantly, though, I'm having a social day out today. It started as a conversation between Jom and James (both mentioned here). James, starting his final year in Uni, has started renting a new student house. We all thought it'd be fun to spend the day in this house, and go for a meal in the evening.

Later this week, Jom bumped into our old friend Lewis. Lewis is one of my oldest friends, as I met him in pre-school at the age of three. It's been years since I saw him regularly, as he did all sorts of crazy things, like living in France for a year. Seems they had a bit of a chat, so Jom invited him along. Exciting indeed.

So, this morning, I started thinking about Phresh. He's another friend of ours from school. He want to Swansea University, living at home for the duration, yet somehow we've seen less of him than a lot of others who moved further afield. It'd be nice if he could come along, though I've not been able to get in touch with him so far. Jom and I intend to call at his house to see if he's in.

So that's our plan so far. Lots of boys, and that means beer and football! Although none of us are super-keen on football, and only a few are fond of beer. So it's more likely to be all talking and eating an Indian.

Thing is, when we were in school, for a time, we got together regularly for nice, wholesome, family fun. Emphasis on the "fun" too - we called them Fun Fridays, since we arranged them after school on Fridays, and went out of our way to have as much fun as possible.

It was a great arrangement. By Saturday, you already felt like you'd had a great weekend, and it was nice for time spent with friends to be so unashamedly fun. We'd go to Laserzone, or the cinema, and we spent one Fun Friday filming our own material (Phresh, specifically, did the filming, being a camera/editing whizz kid).

The reason I mention all this is that James and I want to start Fun Fridays back up. Four years since school, we've lost touch with a lot of people we'd love to see again, but never have a good enough suggestion of what to do. University seems too have taught us that pubs are the only option, but really, I find that they're rarely much fun for simply catching up.

We're hoping to talk about this today, particularly if Phresh can make it. Having seen a fair few former schoolmates, I find that a lot of people are back in a school-like situation again. Some of them in Uni, some working Mondays to Fridays - I think that there might be demand for a short sharp burst of fun before the weekend.

Oh, and I meant an Indian meal, not an actual Indian.

Chapter Seven: Procrastination is Daft

2007-08-09T22:42:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 9 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.
Breakfast Eaten on Work Days: 2/2.

Today's breakfast of choice was Corn Flakes. A bit lacking in taste, but they got the job done - I felt I had a very energetic day, helped, I feel, by my current sleeping pattern.

I'm very keen to maximise my output, and not merely because the phrase makes me sound like a robot. There's always a great deal of work to be done, and a lot of it in a short space of time. So many tools are necessary for the work - from dictionaries and books on grammar to computer programmes and spell-checkers - that finding the most efficient way of completing a given piece of work is very satisfying and also quite challenging.

You see, you may not know it to look at me, but I haven't always been the busy boy I am today. Indeed, there was a time when I was renowned throughout the world for my abilities to procrastinate. There are times, when translating - and very small periods of time they are - when working seemingly becomes physically impossible for a while. Waiting for work to be delivered or proofread, waiting for the printer to get its act together, waiting for a reply from the source of the work for clarification of certain points. As a young and foolish lad, I tended to use these short periods to, for example, check the odd website, or otherwise keep up-to-date with my online interests.

And there lies danger. Because how does one define a period during which one cannot possibly work? Indeed, it becomes a lot easier to justify wasting time as one becomes more practiced at doing so.

Now, for the record, at this time, I wasn't aware that using the internet for anything other than work is strictly against the rules. When I learnt this (erm, was told by the manager), I immediately stopped using it for anything other than work. And something strange happened. My output increased significantly.

That may seem logical, but here's the thing - I didn't actually waste THAT much time before. As I say, just the times I could justifiably consider Times When I Couldn't Possibly Work. So there shouldn't have been such a great increase in the amount I got done.

But here's the thing. When you realise that the internet isn't an option, you soon learn that there's no such thing as Times When One Can't Possibly Work. They're a myth. If you're waiting for an e-mail, you should be taking a look at a hard copy, if one exists. If you've sent something to be proofread, you should have immediately started a new piece of work. Waiting for the printer? Again, that doesn't stop you starting something new.

That's when it becomes a challenge. What if you save editing until something's printing, or what if you send e-mails when there's a problem with the word processor? Better still, how about translating short, snappy sentences first so that you've got a good grasp of the material by the time you translate bigger blocks of text? Or maybe you could start two pieces at once, so that when you get stuck on something, you can switch files to take your mind off the problem.

And once those tricks are in place, it's time to better them. I mean, if I'm getting this much done now, I must have wasted more time than I thought before. So now it's time to pull my weight properly. Make up for my earlier behaviour. Don't get distracted. Don't look away. Don't even think about anything else. I've put off lunch breaks in the past in order to keep my stride.

It becomes a great source of satisfaction, and more importantly, a great deal of fun. I've always enjoyed translating, but now I'm really enjoying it. My manager made a point of my output a couple of weeks ago. One senior translator's taken to handing me three pieces at a time.

Looking around the office, though, it becomes apparent that this attitude is the norm. These people take pride in their work. They want it done not because it has to be done, but because of the fun involved in chipping away at such a mountain of work. We're not in school anymore, rolling our eyes at the word "homework" or hoping we won't be picked to answer a question - we're all depending on each other to ensure that as much work gets done as quickly, as correctly and as efficiently as possible.

And that's what it all comes down to. Procrastination is no longer something that only affects you - it affects everyone, and very poorly too. Like in any profession, it becomes intensely annoying to witness someone else doing the job poorly, and I have a great deal of disdain to Younger Me, casually checking the Outpost Gallifrey news page while MSWord loads.

Doing-the-job-you're-paid-to-do is the new not-pulling-your-weight. And funnily enough, it's a lot more fun.

(Next time, if you're lucky, I'll talk to you about Deja Vu ...)

Chapter Six: Breakfast and Forms

2007-08-08T20:09:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 8 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.

I'm a strong believer in breakfast. And, like many things in which I believe strongly, I don't practice what I preach.

You see, I understand the benefits of breakfast. I've heard of the studies where they offered schoolchildren free breakfast and saw a dramatic increase in attention span and ability to focus. And I also understand that if I don't eat breakfast, I'll be famished by lunchtime.

But somehow, the idea of preparing a breakfast before I leave for work is too much. But of course, I won't get anywhere moaning about my lack of self-control, so I've set myself a new personal goal - to eat some sort of breakfast before every day of work at least.

I did this today, in fact. Only a banana, but even so - I could feel the difference. Alright, it's possible that it had a placebo effect, but I got a lot of work done today, and the time flew by. Success so far, then! That said, it was also the first day back after my long weekend, which included a relaxing stay at Newport, and a reasonably successful start to the Midnight Counter.

Tomorrow's the closing date for applications for the permanent translator post. I've filled in the form, apart from the Tell Us How Great You Are section, which I've left until last for two reasons; specifically, so that I can spend the most time on the most important section, and because I didn't realise until last night how little time I have left.

I always find the section a bit difficult, however. You know what employers want to hear, and you know your own strengths - but you also want to ensure that you give a fair portrayal of what you're like, and put your own mark onto the standard collection of strengths expected of anyone making the shortlist. I may well write it on a computer, rather than handwrite it, and save it for any future applications (since, as I mentioned before, there will be several more open positions to fill after the current two).

I suppose I'd best keep this entry short, and tackle the form wholeheartedly. Wish me luck!

Alice in Chains vs Mad Seasons

2007-08-07T11:40:00.000+01:00

This is the third of three entries on comparing bands (the other two are here and here). This time, I'm trying to decide between Alice in Chains and Mad Seasons.

Another two bands I haven't heard of. Again, I'm rating them based on the first song of theirs I find on YouTube.

The Alice in Chains song I've chosen is Would. Wow, great opening. Nice bass, and a deceptively complex sequence. Good singer, nice backing vocals. He has a grainy quality to his voice, that sometimes makes him sound like he's shouting. I'm not that keen on that sound, but it's not too intrusive. This isn't striking me as a classic, exactly, but it's technically solid. A solo now - quite early in the song, and only short, but a nice surprise. Wow, actually, it wasn't early in the song at all - it's almost over. Wow, this really does zip past very quickly. This has a very cool attitude behind it. All the instruments get to stand out in turn, as well, showing off the range of the band members.

Not necessarily the sort of thing I'd listen to, but very good nonetheless. 8 out of 10.

The Mad Seasons song I'm listening to is River of Deceit, the first song of theirs on YouTube that isn't a live performance. Nice simple intro, but a bit boring. Then again, it's nice and relaxing, and quite evocative. Pretty good singer in theory, but he seems to lack the confidence when moving between the notes. Regrettably, this gives his voice a slightly whiny quality. The music's doing something a bit weird now. Weird and repetitive. I'm not sure that I like it at all. It sounds a bit like a track used for an '80s sitcom holiday special. It's the meaningful bit where the main character thinks over what he's done wrong. There's nothing too badly wrong with the song, but it's very dull. It's dragging badly, and it's five minutes long. This could have done with ending after three and a half. I'm really struggling to find things to say about it, since it's just repeating the chorus a lot. The music's fading, and that makes the vocals sound whinier still. It ends simply, which suits the song.

Boring, but not awful. 5 out of 10. Alice in Chains wins.

That's the end of this trinity of band rating posts. If any music magazine editors are reading and are looking for a fresh outlook on bands that almost everyone else in the world have probably already heard of, do get in touch. And if anyone feels wronged by my opinion of their favourite bands, feel free to leave a comment to recommend better tracks.

Soundgarden vs Inside Out

2007-08-07T11:34:00.000+01:00

Following on from the previous entry, it's time to tackle the next two bands - Soundgarden and inside out. As in the previous entry, I'll be rating them based on the first track I find of theirs on YouTube.

For the record, I've never even HEARD of these bands, whereas I'd at least heard of the previous two. Here goes!

The Soundgarden song I'm listening to is Black Hole Sun. And I've heard it before! I quite liked it, as I recall - if I remember rightly, they played it on my school bus in-between bubblegum pop. This is really nice. The guy has a good, clear voice, and the music's very clean. Very simple, and very nice. Very much a song to listen to several times until you know all the lyrics. In fact, I've just taken a moment to take in the lyrics, and they seem very strong. Good imagery, with cool statements. The verses are definitely better than the chorus, but it all sounds very good. I love the backing vocals in the chorus. The solo's pretty good as well. And it's followed by a cleaner version of the verse, sans drums, which is always effective. Thinking about it, they do drag the end of the choruses out a bit too much. Then again, this song also lasts over five minutes, but feels much shorter. Is five minutes the standard length of songs these days?

Anyway, that was really good. I give it an 8 out of 10.

Inside Out were pretty hard to find on YouTube, but I've got a live performance of Burning Fight. Great little intro, though the sound quality's not the best on this recording. Oh, dear - another shouty singer. More shouty than Rage Against the Machine's, if anything. Oh, here we go - it's upped its game. Quicker, and more shouty. I'm sure there's a market for shouting over music, but it's really not my cup of tea. And there's only so much that can be said about it. I mean, it's all the same kind of shouting. It's not like there's poigniant shouting, explosive shouting, romantic shouting ... it's pretty much all the same, from what I can hear. Dear lord, he's just shouting "Burning Fight" over and over again. It's like Freedom all over again.

Well, it was shorter than Freedom, which meant it didn't get old as quickly, but it was also a bit messier. 3 out of 10 for Inside Out. Soundgarden win.

Rage Against the Machive vs Audioslave

2007-08-07T11:27:00.000+01:00

On PKMN.NET at the moment, there's a thread where people ask me - one of the administrators - questions. These can be anything, and lots of them are "do you prefer X or Y?" questions. Anyway, one poster gave me a selection of two bands at a time, asking me to choose between them. I thought I'd give my response here as well as on the site, for anyone interested in my views on music.

The first choice was between Rage Against the Machine and Audioslave. Although I've heard of both bands, I couldn't name a single song of either. So I typed the band names into YouTube, and selected the first song that came up, rating the bands solely on those songs. This is probably slightly unfair, so if you think I've been unfair to your favourite bands, feel free to leave a comment with recommended songs.

So, below are my comments on the two songs as I listen to them.

Okay, for Rage Against the Machine, we have a track called Freedom. It seems to last five minutes. Not sure I'll make it that long. Intro sound promising ... ooh, those are some bad vocals. See, I like singing. This is too shouty for my tastes. And I don't think shouting "yeah" and "come on" randomly is cool. It's pretty monotonus too. I imagine this isn't one of their more popular tracks. Oh, the music changed. This sounds better, although he's still shouting "come on" a lot. Hey, I'm pretty good at reviewing music, aren't I? Maybe I should do it professionally. Hmm, the music's gone a bit wiki-wah. I mean, this isn't bad music, but it does get dull very quickly, since nothing else is happening apart from the odd shouty lyric. Okay, music's kicked up another notch, but the singer's actually shouting now, no words or anything. Oh, goodness, there's another minute and a half to go. This really isn't interesting enough to maintain its length. FREEDOOOOOOOOOOM! Okay, now I understand the title. This is like a cartoon. If any Rage fans are reading, can you recommend a better track? Sounds like it's ending ... oh, right, they're ending with sounds of feedback.

I'd give it 3 out of 10. And that's only because the music wasn't badly played, and didn't sound rank. Next!

For Audioslave, we've got a song called Like a Stone. Ooh, nice little intro already. Sounds a bit like the background music to a Sonic level. Ooh, genuine singing! And pretty good singing at that. The guy's a bit mumbly, but this really isn't bad at all. Ah, and less than a minute in, it's already kicked up a gear. It's a quieter song than I was expecting, but that's not a bad thing. Nice and mellow. Woo, cool little twist at the end of that chorus. The verses and chorus are a little bit samey, but that works for the song, I think. And now that I'm used to his voice, it doesn't sound as mumbly anymore. Backing singers have kicked in now, and that really lifts the whole thing. And a solo! Is that a therumin?! Either way, that's a really cool solo. A great break from the rest of the song. And now it's gone accoustic! This song is also about five minutes long, but it really makes the most of its running time, with lots of variety. The lead singer's also got a fair bit of variety to his tone, even if he isn't the greatest singer I've ever heard. Oh, and it's ended, and before I was expecting it to. A nice decisive ending that leaves you wanting more.

This really impressed me. I give it a 7 out of 10. So, even though the songs were random, Audioslave win this round.

Chapter Five: Newport - Part Three

2007-08-06T19:45:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 6 consecutive nights.

It's here at last - the long-awaited third part of the Newport trilogy of entries!

And, appropriately enough, very little happened of note. Elanor and I went over to Beth's for dinner again last night, and bought one of those Sky Box Office films. It was called The Fountain, and according to the Sky Info, it involved a romance spanning a thousand years, with sci-fi and fantasy elements.

Well, that speaks for itself, doesn't it? The Fountain must be the fountain of youth, a couple presumably use it to gain immortality, and they live for a thousand years. The fountain itself is fantasy, and the view of what the future will be like will be the sci-fi.

If only it were that simple. What followed was one of the most abstract films I've ever come across. I only watched the first and last fifteen minutes, since I had things I wanted to do on-line, but Elanor and Bethany both assured me that watching the mid-section only made things more confusing. It involved a bald Hugh Jackman in a snowglobe. Highlight the following paragraph if you don't mind spoilers:

Eventually, Hugh Jackman comes to a tree, which seems to be a tree of life. He's been stabbed by an inca at this point, and needs the wound healed. He stabs the tree, which bleeds PVA glue. The tree juice hits the ground, and flowers grow from it immediately. Satisfied that the tree has life-giving powers, Jackman spreads the juice on his wound. Shortly afterwards, flowers appear from all over his body, killing him. Which goes to show - one trial is never enough to fully understand science.

Anyway, baffling film aside, last night was most notable for being a social evening in which I still managed to make it to bed before midnight! So the Midnight Counter's not a total farce. It really worked, too, as I woke up at 8:30 this morning, wide awake, and on top of the world. "Time to get up!" I blared, before realising that Elanor probably still fancied a bit of sleep. So I had to use my new-found morning energy to, erm, let the dog out.

So, after a nice final morning in Newport, I headed for the train station. The good news was that a train for Swansea was scheduled to arrive in five minutes. The bad news was that it was delayed by over an hour.

I chose to kill the hour by wandering around Newport city centre, looking for a free Wi-Fi point. I've never tried a public Wi-Fi point before, since I'm very new to this wireless internet business. But, having managed to set up Wi-Fi internet in my old student house back in Aberystwyth, and having managed to finally connect my Nintendo DS to the Wi-Fi internet back home, I decided that I was perfectly qualified to connect to a public one.

Turns out, they're not that easy to find. I'd been led to believe that all pubs, restaurants, cafés , chippies and even McDonald's (which counts as none of the above) have their own free Wi-Fi system, to encourage you to stay longer and consume more of their beer, soups, jacket potatoes, chips and transfats respectively. But no, none of the above that I found had Wi-Fi at all ... until I finally found Café Nero. By now, I only had half an hour before the train arrived.

Still, I fancied trying the 'net out, even if I didn't have much time. I felt that I couldn't really use it without buying something, so I nabbed what I assumed was a milkshake from the fridge, thinking that it wouldn't need to be prepared, and would save time.

Turns out it was just part of a complex drink that involves ice and warm water, all being mixed together, and it took ages. By the time I'd sat down and turned on the computer, I only had fifteen minutes left, and it takes about ten minutes to walk to the station!

But the worst thing of all? Turns out that their promise of "free Wi-Fi" told a minor lie. Specifically, it wasn't free. It started at £10 a month. Do they really believe that I'm likely to spend so much time in Café Nero that I'll need to subscribe to their internet? What do they think I'm going to need it for? Unless there's a high demand for bloggers who spend all their time in Café Nero for charity ...

Chapter Five: Newport - Part Two

2007-08-05T20:31:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 5 consecutive nights.

Yesterday was my first full day in Newport, and Elanor and I spent most of it playing Pokémon.

I love watching Elanor play computer games. I've played so many computer games that I've really loved over the years - especially Pokémon, but also Zelda games, and a few others - that introducing someone to them for the first time is incredibly satisfying.

But also, Elanor picks things up quickly. There was a time a few years ago where she'd play Pokémon on the main TV in our student house (using the GameCube's Game Boy Player), and a housemate of ours would offer "helpful advice" (by which I mean patronising hints more commonly attributed to in-game NPCs) throughout her playing. Of course, he didn't mean to be patronising - he genuinely thought it was helping. But after the time she beat him in a battle, with her single-handedly trained team, the hints stopped.

Which means that despite coming to the game almost a decade after I did, Elanor's knowledge and understanding of the game now rivals mine. And that makes discovering the new games great. Same goes for Zelda and such.

I think it's part of the mentality of wanting to share an experience. No point enjoying something you can't enjoy with other people, I feel. If there's a film I like, I encourage others to watch it, and the same goes for books. At its best, the computer game medium can tell stories inappropriate for the other media, and since you're the one playing, it can allow for some intense first-person stories. Of course, at worst, computer games are boring, devoid of plot and soul, and in some cases, unplayable. It's rare for films or novels to plummet to the depths that bad computer games can manage.

In other news, we met up with Alyx and also Holly, a former schoolmate's of theirs. I'd met Holly once before, and I must say that I love being in the company of these three. They're full of stories from their time at school. I loved school, and love reminiscing about it, so sharing in someone else's nostalgia is, in itself, nostalgic.

Although! We went to a sort-of bar-restaurant place, which wasn't exactly posh, but was certainly very arrogant. We arrived, and sat by a table, and were immediately kicked into the bar area, since we didn't have a reservation. Anyway, we were made to wait for around forty-five minutes ... before being sent back to the original table. Meanwhile, nobody new had come in - or at least, none were sat in this part of the restaurant - so clearly, barely anyone HAD made any reservations. Some inept and rude staff, too, and they made us order vegetables as side dishes, which I hate. Elanor and I ended up getting just starters and side dishes (they didn't like that!), and lucky that we did, since Alyx's and Holly's main meals weren't much larger than the starters.

We stayed up talking until midnight, which put me about twenty minutes shy of the Midnight Counter, but being a special occasion, I'm letting it pass.

Chapter Five: Newport - Part One

2007-08-04T10:06:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 4 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.

A note on the Midnight Counter - of the four nights listed, I was technically in bed after midnight for the last two nights, but they're included anyway, since I feel I had good cause to be up. On the night of the 2nd of August, I was talking to a friend of mine, offering advice - some heavy emotions were involved, and I think that it was more about support than advice, but either way, I felt I ought to stay up a bit (thirty-seven minutes) longer for that reason.

But enough about that! Because the reason I was in bed at a soul-crushing time of 1:15am last night is because Bethany prepared a meal for us after I arrived at Newport.

(What do you mean, "who's Bethany"? She's Elanor's sister. Honsetly, it's not like I haven't mentioned it already ...)

Anyway, turns out David had to work, and couldn't make it, but instead, Elanor's friend (and mine by now, I expect) Alyx came along, as did Beth's friend Jordan.

Alyx is great. I strongly recommend her for any gathering. Because, you see, she Makes An Effort, and that's rare. Even last night, for a quiet meal and a sit down, she came dressed up, bearing two bottles of wine. And that's excellent.

But also, she's great company, being as she is a Like-Minded Person. I spend my life looking for Like-Minded People. For me, Like-Minded People have to abide by very specific rules. Specifically:

1 - They must understand the vast majority of my vocabulary, and any that they don't, they must be eagre to learn it, rather than giving me a look, as though using multisyllabic words in polite company is the equivalent of burping at a funeral.

2 - Equally, they must be willing to share their knowledge with me, and be willing to discuss the bulk of their own and my interests, with no shyness about their own nor snobbishness about mine.

3 - They must be clever. Apologies if this last one has cut anyone out, having raised their hopes with the previous too.

4 - They can't be Tories.

Anyway, the reason I mention this is because, as it turns out, Jordan is also a Like-Minded Person. He works as a sub-editor for Future Publishing, the UK's fourth-biggest magazine publishers (or so I'm told). Which means that he spends a great deal of his time taking rough, poorly-written articles, and editing them into what you see when you open the magazine later down the line.

Strange thing is, it's been a long time since I was so impressed by someone's occupation. To me, this sounds like the best job ever, and I've been trying to work out way. And as I see it, there are two possible explanations.

Firstly, for me, Magazine Day has long been a highlight of my month. Until recently, my two favourite magazines - NGamer, a Nintendo mag, and Doctor Who Magazine - were both published on the same day every month. This meant that, every four weeks, I'd have a whole day of brand-new information. I also happen to know that NGamer is part of Future Publishing - indeed, I asked Jordan about it, and he said that it's always well-written, and the only work that needs doing to it is normally to trim the word count. Which is nice, as I've loved the magazine for about a decade, from its days as N64 magazine. So I'm very happy that I wasn't disillusioned.

The idea, therefore, of being that closely involved with the mag - that you get their material, and apply the finishing touches - seems really cool.

But I get the feeling that the second option is the more likely. Because, you see, I also work with language, and I also deal with an awful lot of poorly-written material. And maybe, since I take other people's work and adapt it into something that a relatively small number of people will read, I see Jordan's work - adapting the work into something read by, often, a wide, loyal fanbase who really value the material - as a cooler version of what I do. Like if you're a taxi driver and really love Formula One.

So, we had a lovely night, and Elanor started Pokémon Diamond, which is very exciting. I'll try and steal some more online time during my stay, for more updates.

Chapter Four: Elanor

2007-08-02T17:35:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 2 consecutive nights.
Plastic Cups of Death Used So Far: 1.

Let me talk you about Elanor. I mentioned before that I've been going out with her for (by now) two years, eight months and four days. So I thought I'd try going into more detail, without turning the entry saccharine. Wish me luck!

I met Elanor in Pantycelyn, the Welsh-language hall of residence in Aberystwyth. I was in my second year of my Welsh degree at the time, she in her first, learning Welsh as a second language. Quickly, we learned that we had a lot in common - we both like Marvel comics, books in general - particularly the works of JK Rowling and Terry Pratchett, Doctor Who, and plenty more besides.

Anyway, two weeks after we met, we started going out. It was very romantic - I asked her if she fancied giving "going out" a go, and despite the fact that she immediately agreed, I proceeded to outline the advantages, and counter-arguments for the disadvantages. Fun times!

All this was made slightly more complicated by the fact that three days after we met, we'd agreed to move in together. No, you haven't misread - we were already moving in together a whole thirteen days before we started going out.

(And before anyone calls my bluff regarding the maths here, I was rounding down when I said "two weeks".)

Point is, you see, that my second year in Pantycelyn had been slightly lonely. I'd earned my place, since I had a scholarship, and therefore a guaranteed place in the hall of my choice. All my friends from the previous year, however, had failed to get a place, and got houses together in town. By now, I was ready to move out, so meeting Elanor and her friends - an amicable-seeming lot, though two-thirds of them were later revealed to be appalling - was a great relief. They were looking for someone to fill an empty spot in a house they wanted, so I hopped on board.

And it really wasn't bad at all. One of the five rooms there contained a double-bed, which left us with a spare room. It alternated between being a dumping ground, a band room, a technology centre and a living room. I learned to cook, and Elanor learned ... erm ... lots of useless Doctor Who trivia, I suppose, though I did also introduce her to Zelda and Pokémon, proving that not all computer games are about brainless muscules taking out gangsters - some of them are about underaged kids facing a world of vicious monsters!

So, after two years of living together, we're now back with our respective parents, and looking to move in together at some point. Which is both a frightening and exciting thought! This'll also involve Elanor finding work in Swansea, so there's a lot of big things to get done.

Meanwhile, though, there's a summer holiday to enjoy. Elanor's parents have gone to the US on holiday, so Bethany and David, her sister and brother-in-law, have invited us for dinner and drinks at their place tomorrow night. So after work, I'm off to Newport for a long weekend!

Cynics among you may be thinking "hang on - this is the third blog entry that's basically just elaborating on stuff you mentioned in your first; is it possible that you're going to Newport to avoid updating?" And of course, that's not true. No! I'm going to Newport for material! Hurrah!

I'm going to take my laptop with me, and see if I can find any of these free Wi-Fi places I've heard about. Or maybe I'll see if I can find locals with internet access. Or maybe I'll update in Notepad files on my computer, and add them when I get back. Or, you know, maybe I won't update while I'm away. "Aha! I knew it!" I hear you cry. And I have no retort.

Anyway, Elanor's coming with me to the PKMN.NET meet-up I mentioned, which is doubly exciting because she's got family in London, and we may be able to stay overnight.

Also - and we're entering quite nerdy territory here - Toys-R-Us in Cardiff is hosting a Mew giveaway. Mew's a Pokémon, one of a few that can't be obtained normally in the games. The only way to get a Mew is to attend one of these events. Since two new Pokémon games were recently released, I was starting to worry that I'd never manage to "Catch 'Em All" in my old games (I'm only missing Mew and Celebi in my Sapphire game - which means I've caught 384 in five years - that's an average of six and a half each month!), so the giveaway's very welcome news. Since Cardiff's down the road from Newport, I expect to make a weekend of it, staying with Elanor again.

Which means that I'll spend one consecutive weekend without seeing her! You'd have thought I'd planned it all in advance ...

Plastic Cups of Death

2007-08-01T22:55:00.000+01:00

You know water coolers? Those big blue devices that make water more cool? Well, they have a major flaw - they go hand-in-hand with Plastic Cups of Death. You know the ones. Sometimes they're white, sometimes they're clear. And there's a million of them in a holder attached to the water cooler.

And there is just such a water cooler at work.

Now, we live in a groovy time, and plastic cups can (and should!) be recycled. Problem is, of course, that recycling still isn't as effective as going without the cup altogether.

I try to reuse my cups, therefore. I drink an average of three cups of water a day - morning break, afternoon break, and one while I work, and each day lasts an average of seven and a half hours. This time round, I've got 200 hours of work to do, working three days a week. Which means around 27 days, or 9 weeks. It works out as eighty cups of water.

(And I've got a feeling that some smart alec will point out that twenty-seven days times three cups works out as eighty-ONE cups, but actually, dividing 200 hours by seven and a half gives me twenty-six days and two thirds - that is, I will miss my afternoon break, and also, therefore, my eighty-first cup of water.)

So! So far, I've worked for three of those twenty-seven days, and I've only used one cup. I have it saved next to my computer. What perils will befall me? What adventures will I have along the way? And will I be able to keep within my projected limit of FIVE cups during my entire 200 hours?

And, most importantly of all, wouldn't it be less effort to take a glass into work with me?

The answer to all of these questions (apart from the last one) in another eight weeks' time ...

Chapter Three: Translation

2007-08-01T18:34:00.000+01:00

Midnight Counter: 1 consecutive night.

As I mentioned in my introductory entry, I'm currently working as a translator for the St Helen's Welsh Language Unit, which serves both Swansea and Neath Port Talbot County Councils. I say "currently", since it's a temporary position at the moment, filling in to help cover the workload.

This is, in fact, the sixth temporary position I've held there in the last four years. I worked there during my summer holidays to help pay my way through University, and indeed, my last stint there ended just weeks before I was offered my current one.

To get to the point - I'd absolutely love to work here full-time. It's a great job, for many reasons. I like working a nine-to-five office job, since it gives me evenings and weekends free, which is what I want. It also means that when the day ends, I haven't got to worry about taking it home with me. Home time is home time, and after nearly a decade and a half of homework, I can't describe how good that feels.

But additionally - and, I suspect, unlike a lot of office jobs - it's a fun, creative process. Almost all of the work requires translation from English to Welsh. That is, from a complex language with hundreds of thousands of different words, and new words being introduced all the time, to a language spoken by fewer than a million people worldwide, which evolved primarily around its ability to sound nice in poetry. And there are plenty of words that exist in one language, but not the other, forcing you to consider alternatives. Also, Welsh is far more likely to have only one word for a given concept, so translating - for instance - the phrase "private, secret and confidential" can be translated easily to a single word, "cyfrinachol".

We also get to play with a great programme to aid consistency and cut out tedious repetitious translations - it's called Deja Vu, and it deserves an entry all to itself, so I'll save it for later.

Anyway, there are big changes afoot in the department. Already, one person has left, with another soon to follow; two people have been promoted, with another two promotions technically up for grabs; and several jobs have been advertised, open to external people, with potentially more on the way. Oh, and another member of the office is retiring next year.

All in all, things are looking good for one desperately hoping to catch one of these jobs as they come bursting out of the seams.

But enough about my future prospects! Let me tell you about today, a standard day in the life of me, a bearded on-off translator with high hopes and a nagging feeling that a shirt and tie might be necessary in an interview situation.

I had an excellent night's sleep last night. My plan to get to bed before midnight has already paid off, since I was wide awake by 7:40am, with no need for my traditional lemon Lucozade drink to kick me into gear. It was a lovely day, too, as though to reward me for my good mood. At work, I quickly finished a press release ... and finally turned towards The Maths Work.

You see, I was given The Maths Work last Thursday, and told that there was "no rush". This was good news, as The Maths Work was 286 pages long. But today, I realised there was no turning back, and I started to crack on with it.

Turns out it was a PowerPoint presentation, and had fewer than 2,000 words, many of them numbers.

No moral to this story, really. Wait, actually - there is. If you're going to send a translation service any work, just send them the text. It'll get done far quicker, as there'll be less of an "ohhhh, no, I'm not doing THAT one just yet" factor. And also, this stuff often gets printed off. Do you know how many trees it takes to produce 286 pages? The best part of one, I'd imagine! And trees are MASSIVE! I've seen them.

Incidentally, there'll be a leaving do for Lindsey, one of the translators, on the 31st of this month. Which is the Friday after the PKMN.NET London meet. And in-between those two events, I'm off to North Wales to celebrate my cousin's birthday! It'll be an exciting week, full of travel and blogging material.

The Midnight Counter

2007-07-31T22:39:00.000+01:00

In an on-going mission to improve my life, I've decided that I ought to be going to bed before midnight every night, unless there's a good reason for staying up.

Good reasons include special events, and opportunities that won't be available in the morning. In summary, there's no excuse for staying up for, say, television, computer games or the internet.

So, from now on, I'll be keeping track of the amount of consecutive nights I can achieve this, so that if I fail, I can try and beat my previous record.

Last night, I was up until around 2am, playing Pokémon Pearl and surfing the internet. So my current record isn't very impressive yet. But soon, I'll hopefully be chaining them up! It's like a game in and of itself.

Wish me luck!

Chapter Two: PKMN.NET

2007-07-31T12:07:00.000+01:00

As I've previously mentioned, I work for PKMN.NET, a Pokémon website. Well, coming up in later August, we're having a big meet-up in London. This'll be the first time I meet anyone from the website in, as we call it, Real Life.

It won't be the first time I meet someone from The Internet, though. Indeed, that was back in the year 2000, at the age of fifteen, when I met up with Lowri, a girl I'd met in a chatroom, and many of her friends at the National Eisteddfod. I was fifteen, and a bit shy - not to mention rather overwhelmed at the amount of friends she'd brought along. That said, I've seen Lowri many times since, as we both attended various events within the Welsh speaking community, where you always end up seeing the same people.

Then, last year, I met Fran, who created a Doctor Who forum I'm a member of. This was a bit stranger. I'd met Lowri because we both happened to be going to the Eisteddfod anyway. The Doctor Who meeting, which was in Cardiff, was arranged as a specific meet-up. And it was awesome. We went to see The Runaway Bride being filmed, and got to see monsters, a cash machine going insane, and the shops decked out with Christmas decorations in the middle of July.

But this meet-up is different. For a start, there'll be more people there. When I started at PKMN.NET, it was barely a year old, and was just a small selection of pages and a funky layout. It was asking for staff, and I sent off an e-mail. Turned out it was a lot more laid back than I'd imagined. James, who'd created the site, and Matt, who'd joined a week before I did and worked mostly on coding the site, just chatted via MSN, making all decisions that way. I downloaded MSN for myself, and joined in.

I was fifteen at the time, and for the next three years, I spent more time online than I had before or since. The site was, in a way, secondary to the conversations themselves. We were effectively friends who happened to have the site ticking over in the background, so when we weren't talking about the site, we were talking about anything and everything else. A year or so after I joined, a Dutch lad named Jeroen - who'd joined as an ordinary member of the forums - was promoted to admin, and he became another natural part of the team, joining in conversations as much as site work.

In the time since, three other administrators have joined - Mike, Rex and Phil - and while I don't know them as well as the others (their promotions occurred during my time at University), they really understood the site, and what we wanted out of it.

Which all sounds, I'm sure, sentimental and trivial, but it was all a big part of my teenage years, so the opportunity to meet these people is very exciting. Particularly Jeroen, who'll be on holiday in London at the time.

What's slightly strange, though, is that while I was having a great time with a small group of friends, the site exploded, reaching tens of thousands of members. So I'm not sure exactly how many people are coming. Crikey!

Chapter One: Exposition and Set-Up

2007-07-31T00:25:00.000+01:00

Hello. My name is Steff, and I've decided to take up blogging.

My aim is to avoid degenerating into trivia and nonsense that nobody will understand, talking about my friends as though everyone will know who they are. As such - and I do hope you'll forgive me for this - I'm going to start by telling you all sorts of things about myself that are, I expect, relevant to this blog.

(Never liked the word "blog", by the way. Much prefer "online diary". But that's because I'm snobbish, and let's face it, bloggers have no right to be snobbish about blogging.)

I'm twenty-two years old, with a degree in Welsh from Aberystwyth University. I'm currently living in Swansea, with my parents, in the house in which I grew up. I'm working as a translator for the local County Council, which I'm enjoying immensely. It's a temporary position, but I'd love to get into it full-time.

I've also been in a relationship with a lovely lass named Elanor for two years, eight months and two days. I keep count, because I'm one of those types. You know the ones - they create systems for walking on patterned floors and jot down calculus exercises on napkings. Anyway, Elanor's from Newport, seventy-five minutes away by train, and we went to University together. She was in the year below me, and I stayed in Aberystwyth for an extra year - taking a year out of Real Life - since we'd already been living together in a student house for a year by that point. I'd very much like to move in with her again at some point, perhaps with fewer students this time.

Being back in Swansea means I have easy access to some old school friends with whom I've kept in touch. Most noteworthy, I daresay, are Jom and Millywiggz.

I saw a lot of both during my University years - Jom and I liked to work on writing projects (mostly scriptwriting), and he took a year out of Real Life as well, coming to live with us up in Aberystwyth. This means that he's now poor, since we had no loans and no reliable sources of income. Ah, well.

Millywiggz is still at University in Swansea, studying Art. He's got a great, if cynical, way of looking at the world, which makes him great company.

Moving on-line now, I'm an administrator of a pretty popular Pokémon website (popular in the sense that it has over thirty thousand members), where I've been working (for a given value of "work") for seven of its eight years online. I haven't been very active during my time in University, and I'm keen to get involved again, as I'm a great fan of the Pokémon computer games, and I greatly value the friends I made via the website - particularly James, it's founder, and Matt, Jeroen, Mike, Phil, Rex and Breann, who've all been administrators also at one time or another.

So, to those who've read this far, and are basically wondering what I'm actually like. I'm happy! I think that sums me up pretty well. I'm very happy with my life and such, and I hope that that comes through in this blog, since I wouldn't want to be angsty or anything. I don't think I've ever been particularly miserable, and I don't have much inclination to be upset. So, I hope that that's something you - whoever you may be - like to read about, since this will be a pretty optimistic blog, I feel.

Thanks for reading! Please leave lots of lovely comments!